Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Windows XP - To all deveopers and testers....
Deleting System Software:
XP hides some system software you might want to remove, such as Windows Messenger, but you can tickle it and make it disgorge everything. Using Notepad or Edit, edit the text file /windows/inf/sysoc.inf, search for the word 'hide' and remove it. You can then go to the Add or Remove Programs in the Control Panel, select Add/Remove Windows Components and there will be your prey, exposed and vulnerable.
Creating Shutdown Icon or One Click Shutdown:
Navigate to your desktop. On the desktop, right-click and go to New, then to Shortcut (in other words, create a new shortcut). You should now see a pop-up window instructing you to enter a command line path.
Use this path in "Type Location of the Item"
SHUTDOWN -S -t 01
If the C: drive is not your local hard drive, then replace "C" with the correct letter of the hard drive. Click the "Next" button. Name the shortcut and click the "Finish" button. Now whenever you want to shut down, just click on this shortcut and you're done.
Increasing Band-Width By 20%:
Microsoft reserves 20% of your available bandwidth for their own purposes like Windows Updates and interrogating your PC etc
To get it back:
Click Start then Run and type " gpedit.msc" without quotes.This opens the group policy editor. Then go to:
Local Computer Policy then Computer Configuration then Administrative Templates then Network then QOS Packet Scheduler and then to Limit Reservable Bandwidth.
Double click on Limit Reservable bandwidth. It will say it is not configured, but the truth is under the 'Explain' tab I.e."By default, the Packet Scheduler limits the system to 20 percent of the bandwidth of a connection, but you can use this setting to override the default."
So the trick is to ENABLE reservable bandwidth, then set it to ZERO. This will allow the system to reserve nothing, rather than the default 20%.It works on Win 2000 as well.
Renaming The Recycle Bin icon:
To change the name of the Recycle Bin desktop icon, click Start then goto Run, write Regedit and press Enter. It opens Registry Editor. Now in Registry Editor go to:
HKEY_CLASSES_ROOT/CLSID/{645FF040-5081-101B-9F08-00AA002F954E}
And change the name "Recycle Bin" to whatever you want (don't type any quotes).
Managing Tasks:
You can at last get rid of tasks on the computer from the command line by using 'taskkill /pid' and the task number, or just 'tskill' and the process number. Find that out by typing 'tasklist', which will also tell you a lot about what's going on in your system.
Removing Shared Documents folder From My Computer window:
Open registry editor by going to Start then Run and entering regedit. Once in registry, navigate to key
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE \ SOFTWARE \ Microsoft \ Windows \ CurrentVersion \ Explorer \ My Computer \ NameSpace \ DelegateFolders
You must see a sub-key named {59031a47-3f72-44a7-89c5-5595fe6b30ee}. If you delete this key, you have effectively removed the my shared documents folder.
Making Google the Default Search Engine in Internet Explorer:
Open registry editor by going to Start then Run and entering regedit and navigate to following three keys separately and change it as shown below:
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Internet Explorer\Main]
"Search Page"=" http://WWW.google.Com"
"Search Bar"=" http://WWW.google.Com/i.e."
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Internet Explorer\SearchURL]
""=" http://WWW.google.Com/keyword/%S"
[HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Internet Explorer\Search]
"SearchAssistant"=" http://WWW.google.Com/i.e." .
Improving the Slow Boot up time:
There are a variety of reasons why your windows XP system would boot slowly. Most of the times it this has to do with the startup applications. If you would like to speed up the bootup sequence, consider removing some of the startup applications that you do not need. Easiest way to remove startup apps is through System Configuration Utility. Go to Start then Run and enter MSCONFIG and go to the Startup tab. Deselect/UnCheck application(S) that you do not want to startup at boot time.
Customize Logon prompt with your Own Words:
Open Registry by going to Start then Run, entering regedit and Navigate to [HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Windows NT\CurrentVersion\Winlogon]. In right pane, look for key by the name "LogonPrompt". Set its value to whatever text you want to see displayed at login screen.
IP address of your connection:
Go to Start then Run. Enter 'cmd' and then enter 'ipconfig' .Add the '/all' switch for more info .
Making Folders Private:
Open My Computer Double-click the drive where Windows is installed (usually drive (C:), unless you have more than one drive on your computer). If the contents of the drive are hidden, under System Tasks, click Show the contents of this drive.
Double-click the Documents and Settings folder. Double-click your user folder. Right-click any folder in your user profile, and then click Properties. On the Sharing tab, select the Make this folder private so that only I have access to it check box.
To change Drive Letters:
Go to Start > Control Panel > Administrative Tools > Computer Management, Disk Management, then right-click the partition whose name you want to change (click in the white area just below the word "Volume") and select "change drive letter and paths."
From here you can add, remove or change drive letters and paths to the partition.
Removing the Shortcut arrow from Desktop Icons:
Goto Start then Run and Enter regedit. Navigate to HKEY_CLASSES_ROOTlnkfile. Delete the IsShortcut registry value. You may need to restart Windows XP.
Get Drivers for your Devices:
Visit Windows Update (XP Only)
Look at the left hand pane and under Other Options click Personalize Windows Update.
Now in the right hand pane check the box - Display the link to the Windows Update Catalog under See Also
Below Choose which categories and updates to display on Windows Update - make sure you check all the boxes you want shown.
Click Save Settings
Now look in the left hand pane under See Also click Windows Update Catalog and choose what you're looking for. Choose either MS updates or drivers for hardware devices.
Start the Wizard and off you go.
Customize Internet Explorer's Title Bar:
Open Registry by going to Start then Run and Enter regedit. Navigate to HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Internet. Explorer\Main. In right hand panel look for string "Window Title" and change its value to whatever custom text you want to see.
Disabling the use of Win Key:
If your are a gaming freak then you must be sick of the Win key in your keyboard. To disable use of Win key, open registry by going to Start then Run and entering regedit. Navigate to [HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SYSTEM\CurrentControlSet\Control\Keyboard Layout] . In this look for value of "Scancode Map". Its binary data so be extra careful:
Set its value to "00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 03 00 00 00 00 00 5B E0 00 00 5C E0 00 00 00 00" to disable the win key.
Restarting Windows without Restarting the Computer:
This one is again is. When you click on the SHUTDOWN button, make sure to simultaneous press SHIFT Button. If you hold the Shift key down while clicking on SHUTDOWN button, you computer would restart without restarting the Computer. This is equivalent to term "HOT REBOOT".
Stopping XP from displaying unread messages count on Welcome Screen:
To stop XP from displaying count of unread messages, Open registry and navigate to [HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\UnreadMail] and look for the data key "MessageExpiryDays". If you do not see this key, create one DWORD key by the name "MessageExpiryDays". Setting its value to 0 would stop Windows XP from displaying the count of unread messages.
Modify Color Selection of Default Theme:
Open registry by going to Start then Run. Entering regedit, navigate to [HKEY_USERS\.DEFAULT\Software\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\ThemeManager] and locate the key "ColorName".
Right Click on it and select modify its value from "NormalColor" to "Metallic"
Click Ok, and exit regedit and restart your computer.
Removing the Recycle Bin from the Desktop:
If you don't use the Recycle Bin to store deleted files , you can get rid of its desktop icon all together. Run Regedit and go to:
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE/SOFTWARE/Microsoft/Windows/CurrentVersion/explorer/Desktop/NameSpace
XP hides some system software you might want to remove, such as Windows Messenger, but you can tickle it and make it disgorge everything. Using Notepad or Edit, edit the text file /windows/inf/sysoc.inf, search for the word 'hide' and remove it. You can then go to the Add or Remove Programs in the Control Panel, select Add/Remove Windows Components and there will be your prey, exposed and vulnerable.
Creating Shutdown Icon or One Click Shutdown:
Navigate to your desktop. On the desktop, right-click and go to New, then to Shortcut (in other words, create a new shortcut). You should now see a pop-up window instructing you to enter a command line path.
Use this path in "Type Location of the Item"
SHUTDOWN -S -t 01
If the C: drive is not your local hard drive, then replace "C" with the correct letter of the hard drive. Click the "Next" button. Name the shortcut and click the "Finish" button. Now whenever you want to shut down, just click on this shortcut and you're done.
Increasing Band-Width By 20%:
Microsoft reserves 20% of your available bandwidth for their own purposes like Windows Updates and interrogating your PC etc
To get it back:
Click Start then Run and type " gpedit.msc" without quotes.This opens the group policy editor. Then go to:
Local Computer Policy then Computer Configuration then Administrative Templates then Network then QOS Packet Scheduler and then to Limit Reservable Bandwidth.
Double click on Limit Reservable bandwidth. It will say it is not configured, but the truth is under the 'Explain' tab I.e."By default, the Packet Scheduler limits the system to 20 percent of the bandwidth of a connection, but you can use this setting to override the default."
So the trick is to ENABLE reservable bandwidth, then set it to ZERO. This will allow the system to reserve nothing, rather than the default 20%.It works on Win 2000 as well.
Renaming The Recycle Bin icon:
To change the name of the Recycle Bin desktop icon, click Start then goto Run, write Regedit and press Enter. It opens Registry Editor. Now in Registry Editor go to:
HKEY_CLASSES_ROOT/CLSID/{645FF040-5081-101B-9F08-00AA002F954E}
And change the name "Recycle Bin" to whatever you want (don't type any quotes).
Managing Tasks:
You can at last get rid of tasks on the computer from the command line by using 'taskkill /pid' and the task number, or just 'tskill' and the process number. Find that out by typing 'tasklist', which will also tell you a lot about what's going on in your system.
Removing Shared Documents folder From My Computer window:
Open registry editor by going to Start then Run and entering regedit. Once in registry, navigate to key
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE \ SOFTWARE \ Microsoft \ Windows \ CurrentVersion \ Explorer \ My Computer \ NameSpace \ DelegateFolders
You must see a sub-key named {59031a47-3f72-44a7-89c5-5595fe6b30ee}. If you delete this key, you have effectively removed the my shared documents folder.
Making Google the Default Search Engine in Internet Explorer:
Open registry editor by going to Start then Run and entering regedit and navigate to following three keys separately and change it as shown below:
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Internet Explorer\Main]
"Search Page"=" http://WWW.google.Com"
"Search Bar"=" http://WWW.google.Com/i.e."
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Internet Explorer\SearchURL]
""=" http://WWW.google.Com/keyword/%S"
[HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Internet Explorer\Search]
"SearchAssistant"=" http://WWW.google.Com/i.e." .
Improving the Slow Boot up time:
There are a variety of reasons why your windows XP system would boot slowly. Most of the times it this has to do with the startup applications. If you would like to speed up the bootup sequence, consider removing some of the startup applications that you do not need. Easiest way to remove startup apps is through System Configuration Utility. Go to Start then Run and enter MSCONFIG and go to the Startup tab. Deselect/UnCheck application(S) that you do not want to startup at boot time.
Customize Logon prompt with your Own Words:
Open Registry by going to Start then Run, entering regedit and Navigate to [HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Windows NT\CurrentVersion\Winlogon]. In right pane, look for key by the name "LogonPrompt". Set its value to whatever text you want to see displayed at login screen.
IP address of your connection:
Go to Start then Run. Enter 'cmd' and then enter 'ipconfig' .Add the '/all' switch for more info .
Making Folders Private:
Open My Computer Double-click the drive where Windows is installed (usually drive (C:), unless you have more than one drive on your computer). If the contents of the drive are hidden, under System Tasks, click Show the contents of this drive.
Double-click the Documents and Settings folder. Double-click your user folder. Right-click any folder in your user profile, and then click Properties. On the Sharing tab, select the Make this folder private so that only I have access to it check box.
To change Drive Letters:
Go to Start > Control Panel > Administrative Tools > Computer Management, Disk Management, then right-click the partition whose name you want to change (click in the white area just below the word "Volume") and select "change drive letter and paths."
From here you can add, remove or change drive letters and paths to the partition.
Removing the Shortcut arrow from Desktop Icons:
Goto Start then Run and Enter regedit. Navigate to HKEY_CLASSES_ROOTlnkfile. Delete the IsShortcut registry value. You may need to restart Windows XP.
Get Drivers for your Devices:
Visit Windows Update (XP Only)
Look at the left hand pane and under Other Options click Personalize Windows Update.
Now in the right hand pane check the box - Display the link to the Windows Update Catalog under See Also
Below Choose which categories and updates to display on Windows Update - make sure you check all the boxes you want shown.
Click Save Settings
Now look in the left hand pane under See Also click Windows Update Catalog and choose what you're looking for. Choose either MS updates or drivers for hardware devices.
Start the Wizard and off you go.
Customize Internet Explorer's Title Bar:
Open Registry by going to Start then Run and Enter regedit. Navigate to HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Internet. Explorer\Main. In right hand panel look for string "Window Title" and change its value to whatever custom text you want to see.
Disabling the use of Win Key:
If your are a gaming freak then you must be sick of the Win key in your keyboard. To disable use of Win key, open registry by going to Start then Run and entering regedit. Navigate to [HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SYSTEM\CurrentControlSet\Control\Keyboard Layout] . In this look for value of "Scancode Map". Its binary data so be extra careful:
Set its value to "00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 03 00 00 00 00 00 5B E0 00 00 5C E0 00 00 00 00" to disable the win key.
Restarting Windows without Restarting the Computer:
This one is again is. When you click on the SHUTDOWN button, make sure to simultaneous press SHIFT Button. If you hold the Shift key down while clicking on SHUTDOWN button, you computer would restart without restarting the Computer. This is equivalent to term "HOT REBOOT".
Stopping XP from displaying unread messages count on Welcome Screen:
To stop XP from displaying count of unread messages, Open registry and navigate to [HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\UnreadMail] and look for the data key "MessageExpiryDays". If you do not see this key, create one DWORD key by the name "MessageExpiryDays". Setting its value to 0 would stop Windows XP from displaying the count of unread messages.
Modify Color Selection of Default Theme:
Open registry by going to Start then Run. Entering regedit, navigate to [HKEY_USERS\.DEFAULT\Software\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion\ThemeManager] and locate the key "ColorName".
Right Click on it and select modify its value from "NormalColor" to "Metallic"
Click Ok, and exit regedit and restart your computer.
Removing the Recycle Bin from the Desktop:
If you don't use the Recycle Bin to store deleted files , you can get rid of its desktop icon all together. Run Regedit and go to:
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE/SOFTWARE/Microsoft/Windows/CurrentVersion/explorer/Desktop/NameSpace
Friday, June 1, 2007
Munnabhai Software Engineer
appun jaise tappori s/w Engg. ko kya maalum...
saala programming kis chidiya kaa naam hai...
template me subclassing karke apanaa timepass hota hai....
copy paste kaa kaam miltaa hai bass appun khush...!!!
fir yeh coding kaa lafdaa locha kaiko?
are kaiko ?
arre kaiko re?
fir ek din boleto appun ko project mila.....
ya haaaaaaaaaa!!!!
saala appun ka khopdi chakkar kha gaya ...
computer ke saath dil saala takkar kha gayaa...!!!
appun ko lagaa appun kaa beda paar ho gaya...
boleto baap saala appun ko bhi kaam mil gaya...!!!
din bhar appun computer ke aagge...
koi lafdaa nahi kuch nahi...
tin din naa Raghu se raada na Abbhi se pangaa
bass choop chaap...
appun kaa bhidulog saala dar gaya...
bola kya be manya saala tu bhi programmer bann gaya...!!!
phir ek din appun ko kaam kartaa dekh vikya bola...
ye munnabhai kya coding bana rela hai baap...!!!
vikya ko pakdaa... bola idhar aa shahane tereko coding seekhataa hai... saale ko itnaa dhoyaa itnaa dhoyaa... abhi tak thobdaa waakadaa hai ... aur aaj tak uska forms ke saath chattis kaa aakdaa hai...!!!
samzaa ...?
samzaa...?
samzaaa naa...?
(fir ...? fir kya huwa..?)
fir ek din appun ne coding poora kar diya...
form poora karke appun ne testing ko bhej diya...!!!
lagataa tha ab appun kaa kaam khatam ho gaya...!!!
par DTS me issues dekhake sala appun darr gaya...!!!
appun ke saamne tester ne mere coding me ki galtiyaa nikali... aapun ke coding ki poori waat laga di.... appun udharich khadaa thaa... par appun kuch nahi bola... kaiko bolega? kaiko...?
saala ek, ek kaam kiya thaa... usme bhi itne bugs...
par appun ek aansu nahi roya...
kaiko royega...?
kaiko..?
saala appunich yedaa thaa naa...!!!
agale din se phir wohi life chalu...
wohi mails forward karnaa, wohi messages, wohi template, wohi assignments... saala itnaa mails forward kiya...itnaa mails forward kiya... log samze mail server down hoyega... bhoolneka hai bhoolneka hai par kya karega...!!!
training milke bhi jab kaam nahi miltaa hai...
haa thoda bore huwa par chaltaa hai...
(phir ...? phir kya huwa..?)
fir ...?
fir kya...?
fir agale din appun ko aur ek project mila...!!!
shaappak...
saala appun ka khopdi phir chakkar kha gaya ...
computer ke saath dil saala phir takkar kha gayaa...!!!
ho ho ho hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Some Film titles may be like these:
What if the I.T. industry starts producing movies?
Some Film titles may be like these:
· Login Karo Sajna
· Naukar PC Ka
· 1942 -- A Bug Story
· Kaho Na Virus Hai
· Crash Se Crash Tak
· Haan Meine Bhi Debug Kiya Hai
· Shaheed Hacker Singh
· Password De Ke Dekho
· Terminal Apna Login Parayi
· Mr. Network Lal
· PC Sajaake Rakhna
· Hackers' Ka Raja Debuggers' Ki Rani
· Kyonki Mein Debug Nahin Karta
· Phir Teri Java-script Yaad Aayi
· Meri Disc Tumhare Paas Hai
· Aao Chat Kare
· Programmer No.1
· Developer Mera Naam
· Java Wale Job Le Jayenge
· Hum Apke Memory Mein Rahate Hein
· Do Processor Baarah Terminal
· Tera Code Chal Gaya
· Har Din Jo Mail Karega
· Network Ke Us Paar
· Debugging Koi Khel Nahi
· Jish Desh Mein Bill Gates Rehata Hai
· Raju Ban Gaya MCSE
· Client Ek Numbari Programmer Dus Numbari
· Crash To Hona Hi Tha !!!!!!!!!!!!
Some Film titles may be like these:
· Login Karo Sajna
· Naukar PC Ka
· 1942 -- A Bug Story
· Kaho Na Virus Hai
· Crash Se Crash Tak
· Haan Meine Bhi Debug Kiya Hai
· Shaheed Hacker Singh
· Password De Ke Dekho
· Terminal Apna Login Parayi
· Mr. Network Lal
· PC Sajaake Rakhna
· Hackers' Ka Raja Debuggers' Ki Rani
· Kyonki Mein Debug Nahin Karta
· Phir Teri Java-script Yaad Aayi
· Meri Disc Tumhare Paas Hai
· Aao Chat Kare
· Programmer No.1
· Developer Mera Naam
· Java Wale Job Le Jayenge
· Hum Apke Memory Mein Rahate Hein
· Do Processor Baarah Terminal
· Tera Code Chal Gaya
· Har Din Jo Mail Karega
· Network Ke Us Paar
· Debugging Koi Khel Nahi
· Jish Desh Mein Bill Gates Rehata Hai
· Raju Ban Gaya MCSE
· Client Ek Numbari Programmer Dus Numbari
· Crash To Hona Hi Tha !!!!!!!!!!!!
Software Quotes
UNIX is simple. But It just needs a genius to understand its simplicity.
--Dennis Ritchie
Before software can be reusable, it first has to be usable.
--Ralph Johnson
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
--Fred Brooks
Theory is when you know something, but it doesn't work. Practice is when something works, but you don't know why it works. Programmers combine theory and practice: Nothing works and they don't know why. It's hard enough to find an error in your code when you're looking for it;
it's even harder when you've assumed your code is error-free.
-Steve McConnell Code Complete
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilisation.
-Gerald Weinberg
The Six Phases of a Project:
Enthusiasm
Disillusionment
Panic
Search for the Guilty
Punishment of the Innocent
Praise for non-participants
Good code is its own best documentation. As you're about to add a comment, ask yourself, 'How can I improve the code so that this comment isn't needed?' Improve the code and then document it to make it even clearer.
--Steve McConnell Code Complete
The trouble with the world is that the stupid are sure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
--Bertrand Russell
No matter how slick (efficient) the demo is in rehearsal, when you do it in front of a live audience the probability of a flawless presentation is inversely proportional to the number of people watching, raised to the power of the amount of money involved. One of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
--Robert Firth
Fifty years of programming language research and we end up with C++?
--Richard A. O'Keefe
C programmers never die. They are just cast into void.
If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
--Edsger Dijkstra
You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic, but you cannot have both at the same time.
--(Bertrand Meyer)
(Thoughtful...)
There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third works.
--Alan J. Perlis
Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
--Bill Gates
The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time. The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time.
--Tom Cargill
Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs, while the Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots. So far the Universe is winning.
--Anon
As soon as we started programming, we found to our surprise that it wasn't as easy to get programs right as we had thought. Debugging had to be discovered. I can remember the exact instant when I realized that a large part of my life from then on was going to be spent in finding mistakes in my own programs.
--Maurice Wilkes discovers debugging, 1949
I did say something along the lines of "C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows your whole leg off."
--Bjarne Stroustrup
It has been said that the great scientific disciplines are examples of giants standing on the shoulders of other giants. It has also been said that the software industry is an example of midgets standing on the toes of other midgets.
--Alan Cooper About Face
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
--Pablo Picasso
If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong.
--attributed to Norm Schryer
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
--Will Rogers
Einstein argued that there must be simplified explanations of nature, because God is not capricious or arbitrary. No such faith comforts the software engineer .
--Fred Brooks, Jr.
As we said in the preface to the first edition, C "wears well as one's experience with it grows." With a decade more experience, we still feel that way.
--Brian Kernighan and Dennis Ritchie
Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability
--Edsger W.Dijkstra
I've finally learned what "upward compatible" means. It means we get to keep all our old mistakes.
--Dennie van Tassel
Rules of Optimization:
Rule 1: Don't do it.
Rule 2 (for experts only): Don't do it yet.
--M.A. Jackson
Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves.
--Alan Kay
Every program has (at least) two purposes: the one for which it was written, and another for which it wasn't.
--Alan J. Perlis
Technology is dominated by two types of people:
Those who understand what they do not manage.
Those who manage what they do not understand.
--Putt's Law
Copy and paste is a design error
--David Parnas
Any code of your own that you haven't looked at for six or more months might as well have been written by someone else.
--Eagleson's law
The primary duty of an exception handler is to get the error out of the lap of the programmer and into the surprised face of the user. Provided you keep this cardinal rule in mind, you can't go far wrong.
--Verity Stob
--Dennis Ritchie
Before software can be reusable, it first has to be usable.
--Ralph Johnson
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
--Fred Brooks
Theory is when you know something, but it doesn't work. Practice is when something works, but you don't know why it works. Programmers combine theory and practice: Nothing works and they don't know why. It's hard enough to find an error in your code when you're looking for it;
it's even harder when you've assumed your code is error-free.
-Steve McConnell Code Complete
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilisation.
-Gerald Weinberg
The Six Phases of a Project:
Enthusiasm
Disillusionment
Panic
Search for the Guilty
Punishment of the Innocent
Praise for non-participants
Good code is its own best documentation. As you're about to add a comment, ask yourself, 'How can I improve the code so that this comment isn't needed?' Improve the code and then document it to make it even clearer.
--Steve McConnell Code Complete
The trouble with the world is that the stupid are sure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
--Bertrand Russell
No matter how slick (efficient) the demo is in rehearsal, when you do it in front of a live audience the probability of a flawless presentation is inversely proportional to the number of people watching, raised to the power of the amount of money involved. One of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
--Robert Firth
Fifty years of programming language research and we end up with C++?
--Richard A. O'Keefe
C programmers never die. They are just cast into void.
If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
--Edsger Dijkstra
You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic, but you cannot have both at the same time.
--(Bertrand Meyer)
(Thoughtful...)
There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third works.
--Alan J. Perlis
Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
--Bill Gates
The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time. The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time.
--Tom Cargill
Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs, while the Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots. So far the Universe is winning.
--Anon
As soon as we started programming, we found to our surprise that it wasn't as easy to get programs right as we had thought. Debugging had to be discovered. I can remember the exact instant when I realized that a large part of my life from then on was going to be spent in finding mistakes in my own programs.
--Maurice Wilkes discovers debugging, 1949
I did say something along the lines of "C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows your whole leg off."
--Bjarne Stroustrup
It has been said that the great scientific disciplines are examples of giants standing on the shoulders of other giants. It has also been said that the software industry is an example of midgets standing on the toes of other midgets.
--Alan Cooper About Face
Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
--Pablo Picasso
If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong.
--attributed to Norm Schryer
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
--Will Rogers
Einstein argued that there must be simplified explanations of nature, because God is not capricious or arbitrary. No such faith comforts the software engineer .
--Fred Brooks, Jr.
As we said in the preface to the first edition, C "wears well as one's experience with it grows." With a decade more experience, we still feel that way.
--Brian Kernighan and Dennis Ritchie
Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability
--Edsger W.Dijkstra
I've finally learned what "upward compatible" means. It means we get to keep all our old mistakes.
--Dennie van Tassel
Rules of Optimization:
Rule 1: Don't do it.
Rule 2 (for experts only): Don't do it yet.
--M.A. Jackson
Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves.
--Alan Kay
Every program has (at least) two purposes: the one for which it was written, and another for which it wasn't.
--Alan J. Perlis
Technology is dominated by two types of people:
Those who understand what they do not manage.
Those who manage what they do not understand.
--Putt's Law
Copy and paste is a design error
--David Parnas
Any code of your own that you haven't looked at for six or more months might as well have been written by someone else.
--Eagleson's law
The primary duty of an exception handler is to get the error out of the lap of the programmer and into the surprised face of the user. Provided you keep this cardinal rule in mind, you can't go far wrong.
--Verity Stob
5 Philosophies of life!!!!!
1)
"DON'T LET SOMEONE BECOME A PRIORITY IN YOUR LIFE...
WHEN YOU ARE JUST AN OPTION FOR THEM....."
2)
"NEVER CRY FOR ANY RELATION IN LIFE
BECAUSE FOR THE ONE WHOM YOU CRY
DOES NOT DESERVE YOUR TEARS
AND THE ONE WHO DESERVES
WILL NEVER LET YOU CRY................. "
3)
TREAT EVERYONE WITH POLITENESS
EVEN THOSE WHO ARE RUDE TO YOU,
NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT NICE
BUT BECAUSE YOU ARE NICE.......................
4)
NEVER SEARCH YOUR HAPPINESS IN OTHERS
WHICH WILL MAKE YOU FEEL ALONE,
RATHER SEARCH IT IN YOURSELF YOU WILL FEEL HAPPY
EVEN IF YOU ARE LEFT ALONE......................
5)
HAPPINESS ALWAYS LOOKS SMALL
WHEN WE HOLD IT IN OUR HANDS.
BUT WHEN WE LEARN TO SHARE IT,
WE REALIZE HOW BIG AND PRECIOUS IT IS! ................
"DON'T LET SOMEONE BECOME A PRIORITY IN YOUR LIFE...
WHEN YOU ARE JUST AN OPTION FOR THEM....."
2)
"NEVER CRY FOR ANY RELATION IN LIFE
BECAUSE FOR THE ONE WHOM YOU CRY
DOES NOT DESERVE YOUR TEARS
AND THE ONE WHO DESERVES
WILL NEVER LET YOU CRY................. "
3)
TREAT EVERYONE WITH POLITENESS
EVEN THOSE WHO ARE RUDE TO YOU,
NOT BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT NICE
BUT BECAUSE YOU ARE NICE.......................
4)
NEVER SEARCH YOUR HAPPINESS IN OTHERS
WHICH WILL MAKE YOU FEEL ALONE,
RATHER SEARCH IT IN YOURSELF YOU WILL FEEL HAPPY
EVEN IF YOU ARE LEFT ALONE......................
5)
HAPPINESS ALWAYS LOOKS SMALL
WHEN WE HOLD IT IN OUR HANDS.
BUT WHEN WE LEARN TO SHARE IT,
WE REALIZE HOW BIG AND PRECIOUS IT IS! ................
Professional Love Letter
Dearest
Girl:
I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in love with you since Monday, the 23th of Dec 2006. With reference to the meeting held between us on the 23th of Dec 2003 at 2300 hours, I would like to present myself as a
prospective lover.
Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility would be made permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation, there will be continuous on-the-relationship training and relationship appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse. The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us.
Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses. However I am broad-minded enough, to be taken care of, on your expense account. I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving
this letter, failing which, this offer would be canceled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else. I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your sister, if you do not wish to take up this offer.
Thanking you in anticipation.
Yours sincerely,
[Boy]
Girl:
I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in love with you since Monday, the 23th of Dec 2006. With reference to the meeting held between us on the 23th of Dec 2003 at 2300 hours, I would like to present myself as a
prospective lover.
Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility would be made permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation, there will be continuous on-the-relationship training and relationship appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse. The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us.
Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses. However I am broad-minded enough, to be taken care of, on your expense account. I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving
this letter, failing which, this offer would be canceled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else. I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your sister, if you do not wish to take up this offer.
Thanking you in anticipation.
Yours sincerely,
[Boy]
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Friday, May 18, 2007
someone
is very proud of you
someone
is thinking of you
someone
cares about you
someone
misses you
someone
wants to talk to you
someone
wants to be with you
someone
hopes you aren't in trouble
someone
is thankful for the support you have
provided
someone
wants to hold your hand
someone
hopes everything turns out all right
someone
wants you to be happy
someone
wants you to find them
someone
is celebrating your successes
someone
wants to give you a gift
someone
thinks you ARE a gift
someone
hopes you are not too cold, or too hot
someone
wants to hug you
someone
loves you
someone
wants to lavish you with small gifts
someone
admires your strength
someone
is thinking of you and smiling
someone
wants to be your shoulder to cry on
someone
wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun
someone
thinks the world of you
someone
wants to protect you
someone
would do anything for you
someone
wants to be forgiven
someone
is grateful for your forgiveness
someone
wants to laugh with you about old times
someone
remembers you and wishes you were there
someone
is praising God for you
someone
needs to know that your love is unconditional
somebody
values your advice
someone
wants to tell you how much they care
someone
wants to stay up watching old movies with
you
someone
wants to share their dreams with you
someone
wants to hold you in their arms
someone
wants YOU to hold them in your arms
someone
treasures your spirit
someone
wishes they could STOP time because of
you
someone
praises God for your friendship and love
someone
can't wait to see you
someone
wishes that things didn't have to change
someone
loves you for who you are
someone
loves the way you make them feel
someone
wants to be with you
someone
is hoping they can grow old with you
someone
hears a song that reminds them of you
someone
wants you to know they are there for you
someone
is glad that you're their friend
someone
wants to be your friend
someone
stayed up all night thinking about you
someone
is alive because of you
someone
is remorseful after losing your
friendship
someone
is wishing that you would notice them
someone
wants to get to know you better
someone
believes that you are their soul mate
someone
wants to be near you
someone
misses your guidance and advice
someone
values your guidance and advice
someone
has faith in you
someone
trusts you
someone
needs you to send them this letter
someone
needs your support
someone
needs you to have faith in them
someone
needs you to let them be your friend
someone
will cry when they read this
is very proud of you
someone
is thinking of you
someone
cares about you
someone
misses you
someone
wants to talk to you
someone
wants to be with you
someone
hopes you aren't in trouble
someone
is thankful for the support you have
provided
someone
wants to hold your hand
someone
hopes everything turns out all right
someone
wants you to be happy
someone
wants you to find them
someone
is celebrating your successes
someone
wants to give you a gift
someone
thinks you ARE a gift
someone
hopes you are not too cold, or too hot
someone
wants to hug you
someone
loves you
someone
wants to lavish you with small gifts
someone
admires your strength
someone
is thinking of you and smiling
someone
wants to be your shoulder to cry on
someone
wants to go out with you and have a lot of fun
someone
thinks the world of you
someone
wants to protect you
someone
would do anything for you
someone
wants to be forgiven
someone
is grateful for your forgiveness
someone
wants to laugh with you about old times
someone
remembers you and wishes you were there
someone
is praising God for you
someone
needs to know that your love is unconditional
somebody
values your advice
someone
wants to tell you how much they care
someone
wants to stay up watching old movies with
you
someone
wants to share their dreams with you
someone
wants to hold you in their arms
someone
wants YOU to hold them in your arms
someone
treasures your spirit
someone
wishes they could STOP time because of
you
someone
praises God for your friendship and love
someone
can't wait to see you
someone
wishes that things didn't have to change
someone
loves you for who you are
someone
loves the way you make them feel
someone
wants to be with you
someone
is hoping they can grow old with you
someone
hears a song that reminds them of you
someone
wants you to know they are there for you
someone
is glad that you're their friend
someone
wants to be your friend
someone
stayed up all night thinking about you
someone
is alive because of you
someone
is remorseful after losing your
friendship
someone
is wishing that you would notice them
someone
wants to get to know you better
someone
believes that you are their soul mate
someone
wants to be near you
someone
misses your guidance and advice
someone
values your guidance and advice
someone
has faith in you
someone
trusts you
someone
needs you to send them this letter
someone
needs your support
someone
needs you to have faith in them
someone
needs you to let them be your friend
someone
will cry when they read this
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
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